HiS ThOuGhTs

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

ok,in few hrs time,im no longer 24,gona be 25 rite?hmmm ppl who r close knws that i don like to clebrate bday..nono im saying abt my bday,i have never clebetared it maybe diner n stuff with frinds n family...its just i shouldn have born in this world..thats me...
so much thng i feel like writing but 1st lets go within myself
24 years?thats damn long way to reach in what im today.Evryone will say chase ur dream but all my life im chasing my shadow,yes,my dreams can wait abit as im some sort geting slowly in tere.What i achived personaly,my eductaion on my own,thats im really proud of myself,work here n tere n save money n control myslef in spending on other items n paying for shcl fees on time,its a bit of stress but somehow i managed it.Im egostic n arrgoant in not geting support from my dad,i wanted todo my education on my own without troubling and ya somehow he happy la no need to ask money from him.Other than education,i creatd my own soccer team n managed it for 1 year thats an nice one for me,managing guys from 13 years of age to 25 years old,its not easy managing ppl.But have let go of the team cuz of NS,(IM SRY GUYS).Well tere r many things personaly i achived but i cant state all in here..

my dreams,many,like all humans, many of it,but so far none in achieveing it,im slowy in geting them,but i don actually tell frinds or the loved one's,specifically abt m y dreams,even to my mom,but its ok,since im slow in achieveing it,i rather tell now then ppl thinking of me that aimelss guy inlife.i tell ppl i wana live simple n buy 2nd hand car n so on but come on everyone has big dreams....
my dream home,it have to be in marine parade,the apartment or bunglows in ther is huge n its beside's seaside,or the excutive flat i stayed in bukit merah,i grown up tere,
my dream car,toyota camri,its been in the market for 5 years n im stilll in love with it,
my dream place,new zeland,its totally awesoome,
my dream job,working for myslef,that is doing business on my own and manage my own time init.
thi are few only,don be suprised,i also hav a dream of playing soccer for singapore
im not far away from achieving all my dreams.

well lets say abit personal of me...with the almighty GOD...
i thin god is unfair,well who isnt say that he isnt unfir to others
he gave me an wonderful mom,siblings but but he also stoped my progress of my ht
MAYBE HE KNOWS IF HE MADE ME TALLER,I WOULD HAVE TOTALLY FORGET ABT HIM.
so tere im still teh same ht as b4 with an horrible face.
honestly i prefer to be either cripled or somekind of disabled person than being living liek this,cuz everthing in me just doesnt progressd at all...
i rejected from one of the local soccer club cuz i wasnt teall enough,i rejectd from signing into police cuz i wasnt tall enough,i get wired look from othesr when they know my age,
i know whoever reading this will be saying,i should be thankful to GOD...Hmmmm sry he should have created a person with an nice heart than creatin an sinner like me
Everything is craeted by him,he created me,he should hav created me as an cinner for rst of my life or just an nice guy(u ppl saying of me)for teh rest of my life,but but he choosed me in the midlle,im like a sinner as well as nice guy .......if im sinner i wont regtert of things i do but i hav small portion of being nice guy which make me guilty of thigs
that i do....guiltynes will folow me all my entire life...
Guiltyness...
not being a gd son
not being a gd sibling
not being a gd frind
not being a gd muslim
nvr shown love on others
nvr treasured the loved ones
nvr really understood fellow human being
24 years ......its totally guilty of living in here....

Love.......its is nt for me,as i said im realy bad type of guy who will hurt the loved ones...but i learned lots of stuff like a plum guy must love a plum gerl,skinny guy must love a skinny gerl,tere should be certain age criteria for guys to fall in love with gerls....hmmm interesting....but no mater how bad the guy r gerl....if this all criteria met....then they will be happy?...

Marriage....im at my marrige age isit...few of my frinds saying it..isit so..well i think it will nvr happen for me,if im married somone,ohh god imajine,whoever marrying me,will be like how to go out with an short guy,how to introduce to my frinds,u see i don think the gerl will be proud of me at all,i relaised all gerls have thier own dream guy n i don fall in that category at all...i can think of this movie...PERALAGAN,where the hunchback surya goes to the bride home n the bride who is darf,rejecting him cuz he is hunchback,hmmmmm,its scary fro me too...nahh im not worried of hurting myself,but i cant bear to see my family geting hurt for this all...GOD has given gd arms and legs eventhough im short,i know i can put my family a beter place to live in....

FRIDNS BROTHER AND SISTRS....when i talk u all lsten,i know im a gd entertainer,u all laughs n really u all laugh but why when i get angry u people don like it?...im not human being?am i created just to luagh n smile?am i not same like u all...doni have the rite to get angry?....even if i does,don i talk to u people 1st?

i learned one thing in life that nothing is permanent,parents,siblings,frinds house,and other stuff,i born to make mistakes n sins n im supposed to ask for forgivenss for the rest of my life....25 hera im come....but pls be gentle n make me happier by making everyone happier....

He Wrote His Thoughts At
11:42 AM

Comments:

not all tall guys r Success in life nor short guys..it just depend on u how u choose to take life in different aspects...but reading ur blogs looks like u r progessing...so all the best to go on with ur goals ahead...

# posted by

Anonymous : 11:03 AM

# posted by

Anonymous : 11:14 AM

errrrr who is this.....atleast say ur name or nick so i know....

# posted by

Syed : 12:15 PM

nah just a passer-by and read ur blog..my name is saha

# posted by

Anonymous : 5:01 PM

hey saha bro thasnk for the comments...im not someone who is just down by cuz of my or what...wel the fact is god cretaed me that way n he is the who is guiding me...even though i mad at him for creating me i have to say thanks to him also....so saha...love the saha from man u isit?

# posted by

Syed : 5:12 PM

What the f?Dei its siva here,when did u start to blog,and why the hell you wrote such thing in here.Syed until Arun told me I would not have knows you have blog.WHATS WRONG WITH YOU?Is this the syed I used to grow up?Where the guy who has never give up attitude?Where the guy who will go extra mile in helping others?Where the guy who can be trusted and counted in everything?Come on da,short means its not the endof the world,do you think we can do those tings u have done in life?If all the aunites in Bukit merah knows what you have writen,I think they will slap u,Ass y your hp cant get thorugh,what u doing in office now?Who said u don fall in gerls wish list,u moran isnt it ur fault when so many gerls in our area wanted to kow u,u just ignored them?Or do u still thinking that if love one gerl be with her for rest of your life?Come on idiot Look around u,all guys and gerls changing love like changing shirts n t-shirts.Don be gd all your life.Im so surprised u hav such low morale of urself.I feel like whacking.Lets say short gerls reject you,arent they stupid I mean lets says they are sad or hurt how they gona lean on tall guys chest if they are short?Lean on their belly isit?I don think all tall guys are all gd as you.Syed you know what you don have to proof anyone you are nice r goodguy,anyone who knows you will defintly know that.Are you the same syed who we know?Why sudden change in you?If any gerl reject you in u your marriage life,then they missing out the real raw gem,dei I know you as fighter,a real manic who will nevr give up on thing,there ate lot of guys in ur team who just wante dto be like you,not just for the soccer skills you had,but for the character and the effort u put yourself in helpin everyone out.Chey syed im disapointed in you. I Know you make mistakes too,ur human like us try to forget your mistakes,you the one in soccer games used to say mistakes are partial of life n forget n lets improve on and regret so much thing in ur life now?Isnt forgive and forget ur motto in life?Lets me up for some soccer game or renioun dinner.I cant get through yur hp,if you read this make sure u call me.Bye and one more time u type nonsesne in here (I have arun as spy to notice),u will get it from me.

# posted by

Anonymous : 12:13 PM

ermmm siva..niyaaa..u typed that long essay ah?appadiyooooo...so shocking man...anyway relax dude...offce receptiont very weak will call u after work...by the way i wrote whats from my heart...so chill ok....u scoled me badly in that eassy and hope when i cal i get the respect i deserve..dinner is ok for me n for soccer..im working on sundays also...

# posted by

Syed : 12:22 PM

whats up syed!no point scolding me,actually i didnt want to tell siva but i know he is the only one whom you will listen.GEEEEE SYED COM ON MAN!Are you the real syed we all used to know,where’s the big big talk u always give us,isit all just for others?Be honest with you,what u lacks?Look courage truthfulnes bravesnes and most of all shyness all u have, just because u a bit short u think u don have all this?Pls syed,don be nasty fellow and stop scolding me.U know we all go pub and clubing but have we guys ever called you for that thing?NO RITE,Cuz we respect you a lot,but whoever in that position will have joined us as the nite life can easily attracts anyone?BUT DID U?No..you wanted to be faithful for ur religion and stil u r!If anyone can lift you up is urself,none can do it.Don give up now on anything,u hav something special,which is ur mom,none can deny that,live for her!We all humans and we make mistakes and its up to others to forgive and accept us ( this is what you always tells us)If they don’t then they are nt humnas at all(this what we telling you now)Syed you not even arrogant or ego type,I rember u saing sry to thinesh,the age gap between you and him are lot,you think I have done that?Our area I still remebr we took you as someone whom we wanted to be in our teenage life,don disapoint us now! I WISH YOU APPROVE THIS ALSO….Each time u happen to see this,I hope u will realise,YOUR TRUE VALUE,if others don treasure you,it is their loss,GOD will have something great for you!Like he have given me as ur frind(sori,hehhe).I nvr wite any stupid stories to make u happy or enter the heaven,I told u the turth and u know urself very well then us.
Hope to see you ,hey what man,u stays in woodlands not in london or holland,what so difficlut in meeting u?U beter do something to see all of us

# posted by

Anonymous : 3:48 PM

im touched by ur words but the truth is im human too n i do make mistakes and i just cnt simply erase alot of things that had happend...next time don write compo all in here im not teacher to mark all this things...i didnt know so much thing abt myself..hmmmmm..thanks

# posted by

Syed : 4:13 PM